You want to have a prenuptial agreement in place when you marry. You want to protect your assets, and you understand how high the divorce rate is.
At the same time, you’re nervous about bringing it up. Is your soon-to-be spouse going to be irate? Here are a few tips that may help make the conversation easier.
1. Don’t do it when you’re angry.
Don’t wait for a fight or a “heated discussion,” especially one about money. This makes it seem like you only want the prenup because you’re mad, and your significant other is more likely to disagree with you just because you’re fighting at the time.
2. Be honest.
Don’t try to hint at it. Don’t disguise what you want in an effort to “feel it out.” Just be honest and straightforward. Say what you’re thinking and be transparent in your desires.
3. Shift the blame to yourself.
Your partner might feel like you’re attacking him or her by asking for a prenup, saying you want to keep your assets. It may help to shift the conversation so it focuses on “blaming” you. For instance, you may want to point out that you have significant debt and a prenup could protect your spouse.
4. Be reassuring.
People don’t like the prenup conversation because of the assumption that the marriage that is about to happen is going to fail. Be reassuring. Make sure your partner knows that you’re not already planning your exit and that you want the marriage to work. The prenup is protection just in case.
These four tips can help the conversation go smoothly. If you do decide to use a prenup, making sure you know what legal steps to take to draft and file it.
Source: Huffington Post, “How to Prepare for THAT Prenup Conversation,” James J. Sexton, accessed Sep. 18, 2017